Looking a gift horse in the mouth may turn a party into an etiquette lesson, whereas looking a gift basilisk in the eyes will turn the birthday girl to stone. Give curse-free gifts and goods with today's Groupon: for $39, you get a balloon bouquet and teddy bear from Charter Surplus Marketing Founda…
It's not uncommon for a resident to only explore a city's iconic sights when guests come to town or when practicing hypnosis in a mirror leads to amnesia. Get to know your city's history with today's Groupon from Streetcar Guide New Orleans. Choose between the following options: For $8, you get one …
After properly cooking a lobster, its once-brown exoskeleton turns bright red, letting chefs know that it's both ready to serve and profoundly embarrassed for showing up without pants. Make a meal of deliciously mortified seafood with today's Groupon: for $20, you get $40 worth of seafood at Sammy's…
Today there are more than 300 breeds of the ever-adaptable horse, although 90% of them are My Little Ponies. Mount an appropriately sized steed with today's Groupon to Wolfshohl Horse Training in Pearl River. For $20, you get a one-hour trail ride (a $45 value). For $29, you get a three-hour trail r…
Unlike visiting a new neighbor's house, visiting a steak house comes with a virtual guarantee that you'll be welcomed, fed, and trusted with knives. Make a hunger-halting house call with today's Groupon: for $25, you get $50 worth of steaks, seafood, and drinks at Star Steak and Lobster House, locat…
Cellulite is a dimpling of the skin that universally affects women, men, and children who sleep in beds made out of golf balls. Even out epidermises with today's Groupon: for $26, you get a pair of weight-loss hot pants from Zaggora (a $71.86 value). Shipping is $7.50 within the contiguous United St…
Like Mike Tyson, wine is usually robust, is often boxed, and should never influence tattooing decisions. Imbibe the spirit of a champion with today's Groupon: for $20, you get $40 worth of specialty wines and accessories at NOLA Tropical Winery. NOLA Tropical Winery stocks exotic shelves with award-…
When Atlantis fell, the only survivors were its golfers, whose vast knowledge of water hazards saw them to safety. Hone game-saving skills with today's Groupon to Colonial Golf and Country Club in Harahan. Choose between the following options: For $19, you get an 18-hole round of golf for one with c…
Unlike real spiders, spider veins are impervious to rolled-up magazines and rarely inspire beloved children's novels. Squash pesky skin arachnids with today's Groupon: for $99, you get a consultation and two spider-vein laser treatments at Jakes Aesthetics (a $230 value). Torrie Jakes, the licensed …
Walking backward while talking is useful for leading a tour, demonstrating a moonwalk, or retreating from a room full of ominously staring toddlers. See the reverse saunter put to good use with today's Groupon from the New Orleans African American Museum. Choose between the following options: For $2…
Before cupcake pans, personalized dessert portions were made by baking full-sized cakes and shrinking them in the dryer. Skip extra steps with today's Groupon: for $14, you get one-dozen LSU-themed specialty cupcakes at KC's Babycakes in Mandeville (a $29 value). Baking since the ripe age of 13, KC …
The body stands up to gravity's bullying every day, whereas the mind and soul leisurely spend their time playing sudoku and filling up on chicken soup. Declare body break time with today's Groupon to Slidell Natural Wellness Center. Choose between the following options: For $139, you get a Holiday H…
Professional family portraits eliminate the at-home blunders of faulty camera timers, thumbs intruding into the frame, and neighbors blocking shots to announce they need their family back. Leave your legacy in professional hands with today's Groupon: for $40, you get an enhanced portrait package wit…
Heating and cooling ducts are essential components of any home, ensuring a comfortable environment for residents and easy building access for everyday spies. Make sneaking around easier with today's Groupon: for $59, you get a one-year preventive maintenance agreement for one heating and cooling sys…
After a long day of besieging steppe settlements, the Mongol hordes liked to kick back with a vigorous massage, a copy of the Daily Khan, and a nice warm glass of fermented yak's milk. Conquer your own serenity with today's Groupon to Integrated Wellness in Ponchatoula. Choose between the following …
Clothing keeps people warm and looking fashionable, but its most important duty is replenishing bellybutton lint. Keep navels stocked with today's Groupon: for $10, you get $20 worth of clothing and accessories at United Apparel Liquidators. United Apparel Liquidators outfits clients in high-end ret…
According to Emily Post, napkins may only be used to cover laps, clean up spills, or signal the waiter via semaphore that your table has hit an iceberg. Master restaurant etiquette over a gourmet meal with today's Groupon : for $18, you get two 375-milliliter bottles of flavor-infused olive oil at N…
Sigmund Freud once said, "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar," at which point he mistakenly attempted to light the lollipop dangling from his lower lip. Dig into the psychology of stogies with today's Groupon: for $15, you get $30 worth of cigars, pipes, lighters, humidors, and accessories at The Tin…
Horses and humans have worked together for centuries, transporting goods, fording rivers, and sharing the blame for the fall of Troy. Bond with the noblest of creatures with today's Groupon: for $25, you get a 2-mile guided horseback tour through Audubon Park from Cascade Stables (a $40 value). All …
Poetry would be entirely composed of haikus and sonnets dedicated to cakes and pastries if poets didn't devour their idyllic subjects before having a chance to write. Indulge in what meter and rhythm cannot with today's Groupon: for $25, you get a punch card good for 10 coffee-and-pastry pairings at…
In 1891, James Naismith mounted two peach baskets on opposite walls of a gym, inventing the rudimentary version of what we know today as “shelving.” Take your basketball off this grand innovation with today's Groupon to Tulane Green Wave Basketball men's and women's doubleheader on Friday, November …
Carpeting covers cold floors, cushions bare feet, and muffles the beating of tell-tale hearts. Update home décor while alleviating auditory hallucinations with today's Groupon: for $99, you get 300 square feet (approximately two rooms) of home tile and grout cleaning from Pittman Cleaning & Restorat…
A weathered face can help one project wisdom or blend in at Mount Rushmore but is otherwise considered undesirable. Stand out from monumental mugs with today's Groupon: for $59, you get a nonsurgical facelift facial at Elite Skin Suite, located inside Premier Fitness in Metairie (a $125 value). Elit…
Going to the gym is a safe way to work out, unlike doing streetlight pull-ups or fighting public-disturbance charges. Lift lawfully with today's Groupon: for $30, you get 30 day passes to use over six months at The Covington Athletic Club (up to a $300 value). Though The Covington Athletic Club is o…
Without Halloween, candy corn would go unharvested and there would be no legal way to knock on a neighbor's door while dressed as Fabio. Celebrate freedom of expression with today's Groupon: for $15, you get $30 worth of Halloween gift baskets from Cherry Moon Farms. This Groupon can be used toward …